Being a parent is both rewarding and fulfilling, but it can also be one of the most difficult jobs you’ll ever do, and one that you’re unlikely to feel prepared for. Every parenting style is different, just like how every child is different, but that doesn’t’ mean you can’t get some advice.
Effective parenting comes down to a wide range of factors and a long list of things you should and shouldn’t do. Today we’re going to look at 5 steps you can take to become a more effective parent.
Identify what needs to change
It can be overwhelming not knowing where to start so it’s important that you break down the bad behaviour and pick one thing you can work on. This will be slow progress, but it will be a more constructive process and therefore you will gradually start to feel like you’re making headway.
If you’re unsure where to start, think about what keeps your child safe and tackle the behaviour that will reduce the risk of your child being in harm’s way.
Set a goal
You need to be open and honest with your child. Explain to them what you want to change and set a goal. When you approach this part of your new effective parenting regime, remain calm. Explain clearly what you want your child to achieve and try to be patient when emotions get the better of them. What you say may not always be what they hear so be prepared to explain it more than once.
Set limits and provide consequences
Providing boundaries is an important part of effective parenting and many children will test these boundaries to the limits. You need to ensure that there are clear consequences for your child if they don’t toe the line and, more importantly, implement those consequences when the time arises.
To begin with, you may feel like the consequences aren’t as effective as you would have hoped, but any consequence that inflicts a change of behaviour in your child – even if only for a short time – will eventually pay off.
Be a good role model
Children will often learn by example and so if you’re combatting a particular bad behaviour, try and encourage them by setting the example. Perhaps your child has started to swear. Be mindful of your own language and avoid any inappropriate words – especially around your child.
Adjust your parenting style
If you feel that your new and more effective parenting style isn’t working then maybe it’s time to think about trying a new tactic. Parents are often in danger of setting their expectations too high and being unrealistic about what they can achieve. Talking to other parents is a good way to measure your progress and to see what other parents are struggling with.
As your child gets older, you will need to adjust your parenting style anyway and adapt to the changing needs and demands of your child. Although your parenting style might be working now, chances are, it won’t be the same in a couple of years.